I'm a doer....I see something that I think needs to be done and I'm on it. Once I am committed to the completion of a project or an idea, I am driven to finish it, whether it's at the cost of another project or a little sleep. And I like to do it well...no sloppy effort by me: total commitment to the best of my ability every time. It's worked for me for a long time and even though I might be a little tired, knowing that I did my best carries me on to the next project.
Now add cancer to that mindset and it can be a recipe for disaster. After my first chemo treatment, I was knocked on my bottom...literally. I was surprised just how tired I was and when some intense stomach cramps hit me on day 5 of the chemo cycle, I actually passed out in my kitchen. I admit it... it scared me a little, and I realized as I took the next few days off work, that I might not be able to be the doer of old; I needed to find what the new me could do and maybe needed to delegate things to other family members. For someone who sets a pretty high bar for myself, I needed to recognize that it wasn't fair to impose my expectations on others who were trying to help. Recognizing my own limits was essential and letting others offer what they could to help would be necessary. And by recognizing my own limits and asking for help, I realized that others were eager to help and I think perhaps they always were there wanting to, but I was too busy being busy to realize it.
And so, I thank my cancer for giving me the chance to slow down a little and invite friends and family to help me on the journey to a cure.
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