My son's hockey team advanced to midget semi-finals and now they are in finals for both league and provincials; and yes, I am one of those pom pom-shakin', cow bell-ringin' hockey moms whose loud voice can always be heard cheering on the team with a "Go Tigers!" ringing through the rink! If buttons were still in fashion like they were when I played hockey, my jacket would be covered, much to my children's embarrassment (I know my mom embarrassed the heck out of me with hers).
And then, there's my alter-ego....Dance Mom... actually it's the same super-excited, super-proud me cheering loudly at the two dance competitions my daughter has recently attended, but the cow bell stays home and I'm limited to a few hoots and loud clapping at the dance's end. The only bell that rings is the one that the dance adjudicator rings to start each dance. But when that bell goes, I'm on the end of my seat waiting with sheer excitement for the performance to come. The last two competitions have been very successful and a lot of fun and I'm looking forward to the next two.
I also celebrated a milestone in my cancer treatment last week. I received my last chemotherapy treatment. It was an odd moment in many ways. In some ways, I was elated. No more toxic drugs coursing through my veins with the potential to cause heart damage, neuropathy, and extreme tiredness; no more PICC lines dangling outside of my left arm (they were removed allowing me to have a normal shower (without plastic wrap) again (it's funny how we take some of those things for granted). I was moved by the excitement of the nurses in the chemo ward, who proudly showed me the new bell they just installed to be wrung when a patient finishes treatment.
But somehow, deep inside, there was a hesitancy....self-doubt crept up with thoughts like, "Am I really going to be done?" "What if there are complications?" "How do I know for sure that the cancer is gone?" I know that these thoughts are completely normal and let's face it, there are no guarantees in life. Like the line in the movie, The Pursuit of Happyness, there's nothing written that says we are guaranteed happiness, we are only guaranteed the pursuit of it. Bad things might happen, but that doesn't mean we should keep trying for better.
Perhaps that's where my indomitable positivity comes from. I don't believe that any of us are guaranteed a perfect life where everything works out beautifully, but we are all given the power to keep a positive mindset and make the most out of everything that comes our way. We can choose to worry and doubt everything..... or we can find those bell-ringing moments and make the most of them. And whether it's hockey, dance, or the chemo ward, I say, "ring those bells, baby!".
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